Acknowledgments xi
Introduction 1

1. Separation from the Feminine 13
Rejection of the Feminine 15
The Journey Begins: Separation from the Mother 17
The Terrible Mother and the Negative Feminine 18
Abandoning the Mother 20
Separating from the Good Mother 22
Rejection of the Female Body 23
Rejected by Mother 26

2. Identification with the Masculine 29
Daughters of the Father 29
Father as Ally 32
Daddy's Girl: Absorption of the Feminine 33
The Father Quest: Gathering Allies 36
Lack of a Positive Masculine Ally 38
Addiction to Perfection 41
Learning the Rules of the Game with Dad 43
Putting the Patriarchy on Notice 44

3. The Road of Trials 46
Confronting Ogres and Dragons 46
The Myth of Dependency 48
The Two-Headed Dragon 51
The Myth of Female Inferiority 54
Slaying the Ogre Tyrant 55
The Myth of Romantic Love 57
Psyche and Eros 58

4. The Illusory Boon of Success 61
The Superwoman Mystique 61
Reaction to the Feminine Mystique 63
The Great Pretender 65
The Myth of Never Being Enough 68

5. Strong Women Can Say No 70
A Sense of Betrayal 71
Spiritual Aridity 74
Betrayal by the Father: Iphigenia 75
Betrayal by God 78
Spiritual Daughters of the Patriarchy 79
What Happens When Women Say No 82
Saying No: The King Must Die 84

6. The Initiation and Descent to the Goddess 87
Woman's Initiation 87
Looking for the Lost Pieces of Myself 91
Mother/Daughter Mysteries 94
The Grain Goddess 99
The Descent of Inanna 102
Meeting the Dark Mother 105
Mindful Suffering and Return 107

7. Urgent Yearning to Reconnect with the Feminine 110
The Worm Baby 110
Body/Spirit Split 111
Female Sexuality 113
Family Messages about the Female Body 115
This Is My Body 118
A Cap on My Heart 119
Grieving the Separation from the Feminine 121
Grandmother Spider 122
The Feminine as Preserver 125
The Feminine as Creator: Oshun and Changing Woman 126
Refining the Vessel 128

8. Healing the Mother/Daughter Split 130
Daughters Unmothered 132
Mother as Fate 134
The Search for the Personal Mother 136
Divine Ordinariness 139
Healing in Nature and Community 140
Grandmother as Guide 141
Woman as Mythmaker 142
The Origin of Images of the Goddess 144
The Dark Dream Woman 146
Woman's Words 147
Taking Back the Dark: Reclaiming the Madwoman 148
Reclaiming the Power of the Feminine 152

9. Finding the Inner Man with Heart 155
Healing the Wounded Masculine 155
The Unrelated Masculine 157
Releasing Machisma 159
The Sacred Marriage 160
A Woman of Wisdom and a Man with Heart 161
Healing Powers of the Feminine: Hildegard 164
Dreaming of the Sacred Union 165

10. Beyond Duality 169
Healing the Split between Feminine and Masculine 171
A Circular Perspective 173
Dual Nature of the Divine 176
Celtic Christianity 178
The Circle as a Model for Living 180

Conclusion 184
Notes 187
Bibliography 197
Credits 203
Index 205