Preface • Cindy Dowling xi

GRIEF
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 3
Everything and Nothing at All • Cindy Dowling 7
Witnessing • Anna Stewart 10
Shattered Dreams • Annie Hedberg 14
Disappointment • Jennifer Beitz 18
A Blessing or a Nightmare? • Sindoor Desai 20
Group • Colleen Kunkel 24

DENIAL
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 29
Butt Out of Our Business • Paddy Ryan 33
Grandma Knows Best • Paula Ickes 37
To Sleep, Perchance to Sleep • Doreen Bonnett 40

ANGER
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 45
Why Should It Matter? • Sherrie Ball 50
Willing to Learn • Kathy Winters 54
The Why of It • Michelle Portman 57
A "Perfect" Family • Nancy Archer 61
Why Me? • Raylene Smith 65
Difficult Journeys • Michelle Markle 67

DEPRESSION
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 73
Don't Always Trust the "Experts" • Margaret Henc 77
Not Enough Time • Sally Long 81
A Line Drawn in the Sand • Dede Dankelson 84
The Kaleidoscope of Our Life • Faith Sandles 87

ACCEPTANCE
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 93
Dance Recitals Are Still Possible • Becky Whidden Huff 97
I Believe in Miracles • Dawn Proudlove 100
Making the Right Choices • Don Ward 102
Four Boys, No Waiting • Sandra Miller 105
Blessed • Donna Tack 108
A Baby No Different, So Different • Shona Parekh 111

EMPOWERMENT
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 117
Evolution of a Soul • Rebecca Riggs 112
Just Ashlyn and Me . . . Always Has Been • Jessica Bridges 125
Learn to Be Still • Pam Gross 128
Discovering Our Potential • Tara Demers 131
Never Staying Quiet • Tina Rivenbark 134

MARRIAGE, FAMILY, AND FRIENDS
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 141
We Take Nothing for Granted • Carolyn Fennell 146
What People Say . . . • Sharon Perera 149
Pride, Love, and a Whole Lot to Be Learned • Lisa Depperman 153
Much to Be Thankful For • Barbara Bucknam 156
OPOs - Other People's Opinions • Gracie Mackay 159
On Becoming a Parent • Andrea Connell 162

LOVE AND JOY
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 169
The Woman in the Mirror • Cheryl Veenstra 172
He Makes Me Feel Very Proud • Maria Letizia 175
Holding Back the Tears • Judy Ashberg 178
When There Are No Words • Zan L. Liccione 181
Happiness Wears a Cheesy Grin • Rose-Mary Gower 184
Outside of the Norm • Rich Tepper 187
A Gift of Lessons • Katherine Krishnan 189

SPIRITUALITY
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 195
Something Much Bigger Than All of Us • Claudia Enright 199
The Making of an Honest Woman • Natalie Hale 203
Butterfly Wings • Michelle Chrzczonowicz 206
She's Worthy of a Dream Come True • Tony Philips 211
To Love and Be Loved • Kimberly Nava 214

LAUGHTER
Introduction • Neil Nicoll 221
I'm in the Army Now • Ellen Forrest 224
Dealing with the Tragedy of HB Syndrome • Rick Hodges 228
What's Your Name? • Bernadette Thomas 231

Acknowledgments 235
Appendix: How Some Parents Unwind 237
Author's Notes 247
Bibliography 249
Recommended Reading 251
Resources 253
Index 255