Estelle Frankel

Estelle Frankel

Estelle Frankel is a practicing psychotherapist and a seasoned teacher of Jewish mysticism and meditation. She was ordained as a rabbinic pastor and spiritual guide (mashpiah ruchanit) by Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi and is one of the spiritual leaders of her local Jewish Renewal community. Estelle has taught widely in the United States and in Israel, where she lived for over eight years, and is currently on the core faculty of Chochmat Halev: Wisdom of the Heart Meditation Center. She lives in Berkeley, California, with her husband and two children.

Estelle Frankel

Estelle Frankel is a practicing psychotherapist and a seasoned teacher of Jewish mysticism and meditation. She was ordained as a rabbinic pastor and spiritual guide (mashpiah ruchanit) by Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi and is one of the spiritual leaders of her local Jewish Renewal community. Estelle has taught widely in the United States and in Israel, where she lived for over eight years, and is currently on the core faculty of Chochmat Halev: Wisdom of the Heart Meditation Center. She lives in Berkeley, California, with her husband and two children.

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GUIDES

Readers’ Picks

In thinking about year-end gifts, we want to share what YOU have to say.

Below are some lovely quotations from readers on their favorite Shambhala books.

Do you have one to add? Please comment at the bottom!

People Reading

The Art of Peace

$9.99 - Paperback

By: John Stevens & Morihei Ueshiba

“This book showed me a different way, a way to devote discipline of both my body and mind.”

—Clint

The Happiness Trap (Second Edition)

$19.95 - Paperback

By: Russ Harris

“As a therapist, I recommend this to anyone seeking permanent life change realistically.”

—Paul

Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind

$16.95 - Paperback

By: David Chadwick & Shunryu Suzuki

“If there is one book in my collection that I could give away to everyone, it would be this book.”

—Michael

Writing Down the Bones

$16.95 - Paperback

By: Natalie Goldberg

“This book changed my life as a writer, a teacher of writing, and as an individual!”

—Laurie

“This is a foundational book for anyone interested in delving deeper into the richness of martial arts philosophy.”

—Shane

When Things Fall Apart

$18.95 - Paperback

By: Pema Chödrön

“This book set me on a path of healing that has continued to the present day.”

—Miv

Walden

$18.00 - Hardcover

By: Henry David Thoreau

“This is, plain and simply, an astonishing book.”

—Michael

Siddhartha

$12.95 - Paperback

By: Hermann Hesse & Sherab Chodzin Kohn

“Pure, melodic, poetic, this book should be one of the first ones on the list for every serious reader.”

—Pawan

Lao Tzu: Tao Te Ching

$14.95 - Paperback

By: Ursula K. Le Guin

“Every time I read Tao Te Ching, the book feels new again, fresh, as if only just discovered.”

—Robin

The Art of War

$19.95 - Paperback

By: Denma Translation Group & Sun Tzu

“Makes you really appreciate the ideas of strength and courage and the power of emotions and desire in overcoming any obstacle you face.”

—Eman

The Want Monsters

$16.95 - Hardcover

By: Chelo Manchego

“There is playfulness and joy on every page of this book, with a unique tone that has a distinctive voice and is full of heart.”

—Caspericus

The Wisdom of Not Knowing

$19.95 - Paperback

By: Estelle Frankel

“You will smile, cry, and be moved by the writings of a master storyteller.”

—Bruce

A Year of Picnics

$24.95 - Hardcover

By: Ashley English

“Filled with beautiful photos, delightful recipes, and creative picnic themes, each page gives inspiration to get outdoors!”

—Carly

Simple Green Suppers

$24.95 - Paperback

By: Susie Middleton

“This one hits the sweet spot for our busy lives with wonderful recipes of vegetarian dinners!”

—Alice

The Yogi Assignment

$24.95 - Paperback

By: Kino MacGregor

“Kino will motivate you to stick to the practice and walk the yogi path.”

—Julie

Trump and a Post-Truth World

$14.95 - Paperback

By: Ken Wilber

“A remarkable vision and an inspiring perspective of the challenges and opportunities in the chaotic, divisive, and evolving global cultures.”

—John

Mindful Games Activity Cards

$21.95 - MixedMedia

By: Susan Kaiser Greenland

“I think this is a great way for beginners to get started in mindfulness without feeling overwhelmed.”

—D.

The Religion of Tomorrow

$39.95 - Hardcover

By: Ken Wilber

“Brilliant. Life-changing. Psycho-active. Very enlightening.”

—Mariëlle

The Fountain Tarot

$40.00 - MixedMedia

By: Jason Gruhl & Andi Todaro & Jonathan Saiz

“Beautiful artwork that is cohesive and inspiring, high-quality construction, and an informative and well-written manual.”

—Rachel

Eat This Poem

$18.95 - Paperback

By: Nicole Gulotta

“Beautiful blend of memoir, cookbook, and reflections on living a thoughtful, food-enhanced life.”

—Kirsten

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First US Air Force Buddhist Chaplain Answers, “Why?”

by Brett Campbell

Nobody asks for the chaplain in the good moments. This is an unspoken rule I realized early in my career. Nobody thinks of the chaplain after they’ve delivered a healthy child or they take their first steps following an accident that left them bedbound for weeks. These are the times when life makes sense. We don’t question these experiences. We simply bask in the joy they bring to our hearts. It is in the moments of pain and uncertainty when the chaplain is called. The chaplain is called when the child is stillborn, when the young couple wants a divorce, or when the grandmother, the rock of the family, succumbs to old age. People call the chaplain when life veers from the path of normalcy. These are the times when suffering becomes real and our minds begin searching for answers. These are the times when, as a chaplain, I am faced with the question, “Why?”

 

I struggled with this question as a young chaplain. I wanted to relieve the pain a family felt when they lost their daughter to drug addiction. I wanted to fix the situation and make their hurt disappear. They asked “Why?” because they wanted relief, but I was unable to answer their question. I was only able to feel their despair and my own inadequacy. We were all stuck together in a space of intense emotion and no answers. In fact, there were no words that could heal their suffering. Sadness and confusion were the only truth in that room.

 

When we are faced with loss or change, we are often shaken to a place of emptiness. Reality no longer makes sense, emotions flood our system, and words lose all meaning. We normally feel like we have some control over our lives. Life seems to move along on a regular schedule. There are some bumps along the way, but it’s relatively comfortable. The problem is, that understanding of life was always an illusion. Life has always been messy and ever-changing, but that doesn’t change the fact that we want it all to make sense. When difficult things happen, we want those experiences to seamlessly weave into the stories we have about our lives. That is why I am asked, “Why?” We want answers to fill our emptiness.

 

Answers can relieve some suffering, but they are not the way to heal from loss and change. The truth is, the only answer to “Why?” is openness. We have to relax into the pain of loss, the pain of not knowing, the pain of change. True healing can only come through openness and letting go of our clinging to that which we have lost. That doesn’t mean we let go of the love we felt or the memories we have, but we must accept that that which we loved won’t be a part of our story going forward. As a caregiver, all I can do is create a space where fully experiencing loss is possible. I don’t have any answers to “Why?” There aren’t any answers. There is only the present moment. There is only pain and sadness and laughter and memories. These are the things we want the least when facing loss, but they are all that is left and the only thing that is real.

 

My time working as a chaplain has shown me that we must face our suffering in order to heal from it. If we spend our time running away from our pain by binging on television, excessive drinking, or any of the other ways we keep ourselves from feeling, we will never heal. We can try to run away from our suffering, but it will always be there, haunting us. It lives on in our bodies and our minds and wreaks havoc on our lives. It causes more suffering, and it continues to build on itself. We must accept our grief and let it flow through us. It is uncomfortable, but our pain is just as impermanent as the reality we are grieving. Only after we have allowed ourselves to fully feel our emotions and make peace with them and our loss can we truly begin to heal. Only then can we fully move on into our new reality, allowing for life to continue without answers and accepting it exactly as it is.

Related Books

When Things Fall Apart

$18.95 - Paperback

By: Pema Chödrön

What Really Helps

$24.95 - Paperback

By: Karen Kissel Wegela

Mind Beyond Death

$26.95 - Paperback

By: Dzogchen Ponlop Rinpoche

The Wisdom of Not Knowing

$19.95 - Paperback

By: Estelle Frankel

Brett Campbell

Brett Campbell is the first Buddhist chaplain in the history of the US Air Force. He has also worked as a hospital and hospice chaplain. He is a graduate of Naropa University’s Master of Divinity program and is currently training to become a certified a life coach. Brett founded Life Lived Now LLC, a mindfulness based personal coaching company whose mission is to empower people to discover their authentic selves and live their lives to the fullest. He was ordained as an Upasaka by Dzogchen Ponlop Rinpoche.

Healing through the Dark Emotions

$24.95 - Paperback

By: Miriam Greenspan

Love Hurts

$12.95 - Paperback

By: Lodro Rinzler

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